Westeros
The 'A Song of Ice and Fire' Domain
GoT
EP401: Two Swords
Tyrion welcomes a guest to King’s Landing. At Castle Black, Jon Snow finds himself unwelcome. Dany is pointed to Meereen, the mother of all slave cities. Arya runs into an old acquaintance.
Index
Recap
The camera tracks up over a wolf pelt scabbard to reveal Ice—not seen for a very long time on the show—as someone draws it. It is Tywin Lannister. He studies it a moment and gives it to a smith who proceeds to separate the hilt from the blade, and then places the blade into a firey forge. The steel melts and is poured into two molds, one longer, one shorter. Lord Tywin takes up the wolf pelt and throws it into the fire afterwards.
Jaime Lannister, dressed in his Kingsguard armor, admires a golden-hilted longsword of Valyrian steel as his father looks on. Jaime remarks it looks freshly forged, and Tywin admits it is. Jaime questions this as no one has made Valyrian steel since the Doom of Valyria, but Tywin replies that there are three smiths who can rework Valyrian steel, and the finest of them was invited from Volantis. Jaime wonders where the Valyrian steel came from, and Tywin merely remarks that it was from someone who no longer had need of it. Jaime admires the blade further and comments that his father has long wanted to have such a sword in the family… and Tywin notes that they now have two, pointing out that the original weapon as “absurdly large” and had steel enough for two swords.
Jaime thanks his father, calling it glorious. Tywin eyes his son and suggests he’ll have to train his left hand to wield such a blade. Jaime is flippant about it, saying any decent swordsman can fight with either hand, but Tywin points out that he’ll never be as good with his left as he was with his right. Jaime agrees, but so long as he’s still better than everyone else, he can live with it. Lord Tywin then tells his son that with one hand, he can no longer serve in the Kingsguard. Ser Jaime immediately questions it, insisting he will remain in the Kingsguard because the oath is for life. Tywin tries to argue that the war is done and Joffrey is safe, but Jaime denies Joffrey’s safety, stating that there are many people in the city who would be glad to see him dead.
Tywin ignores Jaime’s protests and informs him that there are other knights who can protect Joffrey while Jaime returns home, informing him that he wants him to go to Casterly Rock and rule there as Tywin’s heir, as Tywin does not expect to ever see the Rock again now that he is Hand of the King. Jaime walks away from his father, and says that he is called “Kingslayer, oathbreaker, man without honor,” but that now his father wants him to break another sacred vow. At that, Tywin replies no vows will be broken, as there is precedence for relieving a Kingsguard of his duties (since Joffrey removed Barristan Selmy from his office). Jaime replies, “No.” Tywin argues, and though Jaime says that his honor is beyond hope of repair, he still does not want Casterly Rock, a wife, or children.
“What do you want?” Tywin then asks, sharply. “Supper would be nice,” Jaime replies. Tywin complains that for 40 years he has tried to teach his son, and Jaime has never learned. He then curtly commands him to go, that if the sum of his ambitions are to serve as a glorified bodyguard, then he should go and serve. Jaime supposes his father will want him to return the Valyrian steel sword… but Tywin does tell him to keep it, suggesting, “A one-handed man with no family needs all the help he can get.” Jaime leaves with the sword.
Outside the walls of King’s Landing, Tyrion Lannister stands with Podrick Payne holding Joffrey’s banner and a seated, drinking Ser Bronn. Behind them are a company of goldcloaks. As a wayfarer passes by with some goats, Bronn asks, “How many Dornishmen does it take to fuck a goat?” Tyrion asks him to stop. Bronn complains about not having been able to meet the person they’re waiting for in a tavern, but Tyrion replies that they are awaiting the Prince of Dorne, not some sellsword friend of Bronn’s. Bronn questions his importance, wondering why they would send Tyrion to meet him rather than someone else more favored by the king. Tyrion replies that there’s bad blood between the Martells of Dorne and the Lannisters of Casterly Rock. That leads Bronn to suppose that in case the Martells want to spill some of that Lannister blood, Tyrion would be no great loss. Tyrion takes umbrage at this and replies that he’s accomplished restaurant.
Then word arrives of the approach of the people they’re awaiting. The company of men in colorful, rich robes bears banners of various houses of Dorne, and Podrick shows some accomplishment with heraldry, identifying the lemons of House Dalt of Lemonwood, the vulture and baby of House Blackmont, the crowned skull of House Manwoody of Kingsgrave. Tyrion asks if he sees the red sun pierced by a spear of House Martell, but Podrick cannot see it. Tyrion moves forward with trepidation to greet the rider at its head. When Tyrion notes that he does not see Prince Doran in their company, the Dornishman replies that Prince Doran’s health did not permit him to make the journey, so he has sent his brother Prince Oberyn in his stead. It’s clear that this troubles Tyrion, but he presses on, saying that Joffrey will be pleased to have the company of such a renowned warrior at his wedding. The Dornishman replies, “Will he?”
Tyrion asks Oberyn’s whereabouts, and the Dornishman reveals that he is .. and then asks where Oberyn is. The Dornishman reveals that Oberyn arrived before dawn and was not fond of welcome parties. Tyrion ushers them into the city and the Dornishmen press on without waiting for the rest of his words. As Tyrion turns back to the city, Bronn remarks sarcastically that that was accomplished diplomacy. Bronn then asks what they’re doing next. Tyrion replies that they must find Oberyn before he kills someone, or several someones, and then asks Bronn that if you’re famous for “fucking half of Westeros” and just arrived after a long journey, where would he go? Bronn says he’d go to sleep, but he’s getting old.
In Littlefinger’s brothel, Prince Oberyn Martell is examining three of his prostitutes under the watchful eye of Oliver(????), who now openly works for Littlefinger. Reclining on a bed with a cup of wine in her hand is a Dornishwoman. Oberyn asks he show finds the first prostitute, and she replies she is beautiful, but pale. As he undresses the prostitute, he remarks that they like them pale in King’s Landing as it shows they do not work the fields. Oberyn asks the woman if he frightens her, and she shakes her head but doesn’t dare speak. The woman dismisses her, calling her timid and that timidity bores her. Oberyn goes to the next prostitute and looking at her remarks she’s a bit of mischief. Oberyn tells the Dornishwoman that the prostitute seems to like her, and she replies that she has good taste. Oberyn fondles the girl and suggests she’s not timid at all, leading the woman to boldly go forward toward Dornishwoman and shows herself to be very flexible. The Dornishwoman laughs with delight: “Not timid!” She goes forward to get closer to the prostitute, when Oberyn asks the prostitute if she likes women. She replies that she does when they look like the Dornishwoman. The Dornishwoman is quite pleased, and touches her as Oberyn kisses Dornishwoman’s shoulder.
Oliver says, “Very well, my lady.” At that the Dornishwoman protests saying she is no lady. He explains that it is merely a courtesy in the establishment, but she says it’s a lie anywhere. She is a bastard, she says, and the girl is a whore, and Oliver is… a procurer? Oliver moves to asking if anything else is needed, and Oberyn tells him that the other girls can leave… but that he should stay. Oliver notes he’s not on offer, but Oberyn disagrees, saying anyone who works for Littlefinger is on offer. The prince commands him to remove his clothes and that they’ll be busy for a time. Then he turns to him and says he is a prince, and asks if Oliver has ever been with a prince. Oliver replies that he hasn’t… but notes he is wildly expensive. As the prostitute and Dornishwoman disport in the bed, Oliver asks which way Oberyn likes it. Oberyn fondles him forcefully and replies, “My way.”
Just then, however, he is distracted by a voice singing “The Rains of Castamere”. Dornishwoman, hearing it, disentangles herself from the prostitute and starts, “Oberyn? Oberyn, don’t.” He ignores her, striding off, and she follows after him anxiously.
In another room in the brothel, two Lannister guards have prostitues seated on their laps. One of them is the singer. Oberyn interrupts them, entering the room casually, at one point running his hand over a candle flame. Oberyn asks them to forgive him for staring, but he does not see many Lannisters from where he’s from. The second guard replies that they don’t see many Dornishmen in King’s Landing, to which Oberyn replies that they don’t care for the smell. Dornishwoman arrives then, rushing to Oberyn’s side and clinging to him as she urges him to come away with her. As Oliver attempts to offer a private room to Oberyn, sensing trouble, the first guard tells Oliver that he’s wasting Dornishwoman on a Dornishman—assuming her to be one of the brothel’s prositutes—and suggests he get him “a shaveed goat and a bottle of olive oil.” The guards laugh, but Oberyn does not. He then asks the men while all the world hates a Lannister. He approaches them, and they stand up. He answers that they think their gold, their lions, and their gold lions make them better than anyone. But then he tells them a secret: they are not golden lions, and that the first guard is just a “pink little man who is far too slow on the draw.”
There’s a tense moment… and then the guard goes for his sword, but Martell is far quicker, stabbing a dagger through his wrist. Oberyn tells him a long sword is a bad option in such close quarters… then looks to the second guard, his sword half-drawn, and warns him that if he has to pull the dagger it will lead to far more bleeding ... but that the man will live, if he goes and gets help immediately. He smiles, as the first guard screams in agony.
Just then, Tyrion enters, greeting Oberyn and asking him to forgive the intrusion… befor realizing what’s going on. The second guard sheathes his sword, and Oberyn draws his dagger and sheathes it. The guards stumble away as the Dornishwoman goes up to Oberyn. The prince apologizes to her, calling her his love, and the two seem to forget Tyrion’s presence, unable to keep hands or mouths off one another. Tyrion speaks up after an awkward silence, informing Oberyn that he’s there to welcome him. The two do not respond at first, but then introduces the Dornishwoman as Ellaria Sand, his paramour, and then identifies Tyrion as the Imp, the son of Tywin Lannister. Tyrion asks for Oberyn to let him know if there’s anything he can do to make the stay in King’s Landing more pleasant… but Oberyn ignores him, and instead asks if Bronn is Tyrion’s hired killer. He replies it started that way, but now he’s a knight. The prince asks how that came to pass, and Bronn says that he killed the right people. Oberyn laughs at that, and tells Oliver to fetch more girls, asking if the men want to join them. Tyrion shakes his head, and Bronn nods. Oberyn asks if Tyrion doesn’t partake, and Tyrion replies that he’s now married. He then asks a private word with Oberyn.
Outside the brothel, Oberyn remarks that he visited the Lannister brothel by mistake. Tyrion replies they take all kinds, to which Oberyn says, “Even Dornishmen.” Tyrion presses on, saying that the king is very grateful. Oberyn doubts that, saying that Joffrey is offended, as Oberyn is only the second son. Tyrion notes that as a second son himself, he’s used to being the family insult. Oberyn chuckles. When Tyrion asks why Oberyn came, Oberyn says he was invited to the wedding, but Tyrion doubts that. The Dornish prince eyes him and then says that the last time he was in King’s Landing, it was for the wedding of his sister Elia to Prince Rhaegar Targaryen, “the last dragon.” Tyrion seems uncomfortable with that, but it’s clear it’s because a pair of City Watch men are just passing, as if to talk of such things requires secrecy. Oberyn goes on that she loved Rhaegar, bore his children, fed them at her own breast and adored them so much even the wet nurse could not touch them… but then “beautiful, noble Rhaegar Targaryen” left her for another woman and started a war that ended in King’s Landing when Tywin’s army took the city.
Tyrion starts to clarify some point about Tywin’s role but Oberyn speaks over him, saying that the children were butchered and wrapped up in Lannister cloaks. He then asks Tyrion if he knows what they did to Elia. Tyrion looks down, and Oberyn puts his hand under his chin and forces him to look at him: “I am asking you a question.” Tyrion pushes the hand away as he says only that he’s heard rumors. Oberyn says he has heard them as well… but the one he keeps hearing is that Ser Gregor Clegane, the Mountain that Rides, raped her and then split her in half with his greatsword. Tyrion says he was not there and that he doesn’t know anything. Oberyn goes on to say that if the Mountain killed Princess Elia, it was at Tywin’s orders… and then tells Tyrion to inform Tywin that he is there because “the Lannisters are not the only ones who pay their debts.” He then walks back to the brothel.
On the shore of Slaver’s Bay, Daenerys sits on a rock watching two of her dragons playing with one another in the sky, while Drogon—grown much larger since last seen—rests his head in her lap as she rubs his head. It is an idyllic moment. Jorah Mormont comes into view, watching as the two dragons come closer and reveal themselves to have been fighting over the carcass of a lamb which drops from their talons to the ground near Daenerys and Drogon. As the two fly down and fight over it, Drogon plunges in. Daenerys reaches for him, and he suddenly turns at her and snarls dangerously before seeming to pull away and leave the carcass to the other dragons. They fly off as Drogon screams after them, and then launches himself into the air. Jorah climbs up the rock as Daenerys watches the dragons with trepidation. Ser Jorah tells her they’re dragons, and cannot be tamed, even by their mother.
Ser Jorah and Daenerys are seen walking past serried ranks of the Unsullied and join Ser Barristan Selmy and Missandei. Daenerys wonders where Daario Naharis and Grey Worm are, and Selmy says they are gambling. This surprises Daenerys, and she goes to investigate as Selmy nods in the direction of the two men. Daenerys continues on past her thousands of Unsullied.
Passing through a camp of her freed slaves, many of them bowing to her and calling after her, “Mhysa”, Daenerys comes to find Naharis and Grey Worm sitting before one another, each holding a blade on outstretched arms. Daenerys asks how long they have been at it, and Missandei says it started at midnight. Naharis remarks that Grey Worm is stronger than he looks but that his arms are beginning to shake. Daenerys asks what the prize is in the “stupid contest”, to watch Daario replies that the winner will have the honor riding at her side as they march on Meereen. Daenerys responds that that honor will go to Ser Jorah and Ser Barristan, as neither kept her waiting. She informs them they will ride in the rearguard and guard livestock as she turns to go—but neither man stops, so she adds that the last man holding his sword can find a new queen to fight for. Both men drop their weapons simultaneously.
As Daario and Grey Worm get up, Daario noticed Grey Worm’s looks at Missandei and asks in Valyrian if he likes her. The Unsullied officer replies that Naharis is not a smart man, to which Naharis replies that he’d rather have no brains and two balls.
In King’s Landing, Shae serves a meal to a morose Sansa, who refuses to eat and ignores entreaties for her to try something. Shae even tries lemon cakes, to no effectg. Tyrion arrives and at Shae’s prompting tells Sansa she must eat, but Sansa refuses. Tyrion asks for a moment alone with his wife; a servant leaves, and after awhile Shae does as well. Tyrion sits with Sansa, holding her hand, and insists he can’t let her starve as he swore to protect her. He wants to help her, he says. and at that Sansa asks how he can help her. She notes she lies awake all night, thinking about the deaths of her brother and mother. Tyrion suggests he could get a potion to help her sleep, but Sansa presses on, asking if he knows what they did to Robb, how they sewed Grey Wind’s head to his body, and how they cut Catelyn’s throat to the bone and threw her body into the river.
Tyrion says what happened was a terrible crime. He did not know Robb, but he seemed like a good man. As to Catelyn, he says he admired her despite her wanting to execute him. She was strong, he says, and fierce when protecting her children. He tells Sansa that Catelyn would want her to carry on. Sansa fights back tears and excuses herself, saying she wishes to visit the Godswood. Tyrion says prayer can be helpful, but she notes she no longer prays and that it’s simply the only place where she is left alone and no one talks to her.
Tyrion enters his chambers to find Shae reclining in his bed. She tries to entice him into bed with her, kissing and fondling him, but he explains matters are tense. When she questions it, he lists various reasons for his tension: Joffrey wants to murder him, his wife hates him, Oberyn Martell wants to murder everyone whose last name is Lannister. She insists he should relax, and puts his hand between her thighs. He almost succumbs, but pulls away. He insists it’s not a good time, and she replies it’s never a good time, suggesting his child bride is the reason for his reticence. He stops her from going further, but she asks if he loves Sansa. He says he barely knows her, that she’s a child, and that she despises him. She claims that’s no answer, but he retorts that it is. She then accuses him of offering her diamonds to ship her away, obliquely refering to Varys’s approach. Tyrion does not know what she is talking about. She insists that if he wants her to leave, to say so to her face, but he still says he has no idea what she means. Then she asks him to say that he wants her to stay… but he can’t say that. She departs angrily… but outside, hidden behind a pillar, is a woman of the court who overheard the argument.
The former maester Qyburn helps Jaime put on a large, golden hand on his stump. Qyburn admires the workmanship, leading Jaime to suggest that he can chop off his own hand and take it for his own. Cersei, pouring a glass of wine, tells him not to be an ingrate and claims she spent days working with the goldsmith on every detail. Jaime questions that, and she admits it was just the better part of an afternoon. Qyburn asks how it feels, and Jaime suggests a hook would be more practical. Cersei considers the hand elegant, however. Qyburn makes to leave, and Cersei thanks him for helping her with “that other matter”. When he asks after her symptoms, she says they are gone completely. She thanks him as a maester, but he reminds her he isn’t one yet is still happy to help. He leaves, and Jaime tells Cersei he’s an odd little man. She admits she’s grown fond of him, and that he’s quite talented.
Jaime asks what the symptoms were, as Cersei pours herself another glass of wine, and she tells him that they do not concern him. Jaime asks if Qyburn touched her to examine her, and she wonders if he’s jealous. Jaime merely says he’s surprised, since Cersei never allowed Pycelle let her. She laughs and indicates she’d never let “that old lecher” put his hands on her; besides, he smells like a dead cat. Jaime notes he’s never smelled a dead cat, and she replies they smell like Pycelle. Then, changing the subject, Jaime notes that Cersei drinks more than she used to. She admits it. When he questions it, she notes that Jaime’s disappearance after his brawl with Eddard stark, Robert’s tragic death while hunting—Jaime sarcastically suggests that must have been traumatic—and her only daughter was shipped away to Dorne, plus having gone through a siege (rather a short one) and then having to wed her eldest son to a “little bitch” from Highgarden and while she herself is supposed to marry her brother, a renowned “pillowbiter”.
Jaime joins her where she’s seated, and notes Tywin disowned him. She doubts that, noting that Jaime is all he has. Jaime points out that she’s forgotten Tyrion. She pauses and then asks if he truly means to stay in the Kingsguard. He notes that it means he will be able to stay in the Red Keep with her, and starts to nuzzle her neck. She stands up abruptly, telling him not now. He questions when, noting that he’s been in the city for weeks now. Cersei walks away from him and says nothing. He realizes something has changed, to which she replies, “Everything’s changed!” His return without an apology and with a missing hand and expects everything to be the same. Jaime wonders what he should apologize for, and she replies he should have apologized for leaving her. When he questions whether she thought he wanted to be captured, she coldly replies that she doesn’t know what he wanted, as he wasnt’ there. “You left me. Alone,” she repeats. Jaime says that every day he plotted to escape, and murdered people to get back to her. But she stops him, telling him he took too long. He asks what she means, but she does not clarify.
A knock at the door interrupts them. Jaime tells them to go away, but Cersei calls them in. The court woman who witnessed Shae’s departure from Tyrion’s chamber apologizes for interrupting them, but tells Cersei she was told to come to her if there was anything important.
In a ravine in the North, the wildlings under Tormund Giantsbane are encamped. Ygritte fletches arrows, and Tormund comes up to her and ask if she means to kill all the crows herself. She retorts by asking if he means to just sit there, scratching his balls until witner. He replies that he’s waiting for Mance’s orders, but she notes that if the messenger he sent back over the Wall during a full moon hasn’t come back yet, he never will come back. Tormund questions if she wants to march on Castle Black with just the few men they have when her “pretty crow” is there with a 1,000 men. She says Jon Snow is a liar, but Tormund stops her—she uses “is”, not “was”, and notes she reported putting three arrows in Jon. She insists he did, and to that Tormund replies that he’s seen her hit a rabbit in the eye from 200 yards… so if Jon survived those arrows, it’s because she wanted him to escape.
Then a wildling lookout whistles, alerting them to someone approaching. A group of bald widllings with ritual scars across their heads and faces approach, led by one man. Tormund calls them Thenns, and says he hates them as he puts his sword away. The leader of the Thenns indicates that Mance sent them, and when Tormund asks how they found them, the leader looks to another man—a Thenn skinchanger, with an owl on his shoulder. Tormund notes that they’ve come from the south, not the north, but the Thenn leader replies that they took a detour to get some food from a village in that direction. The other Thenns move past them to take over the cooking fire where the wildlings have spitted some rabbits. The Thenn leader wonders why the meat tastes so much better south of the Wall, but rejects Tormund’s offer of partaking in the meat they already have.
The Thenn leader guesses everything is better fed in the south, fat and lazy… which makes it easier for them. Then the Thenn guesses that since they didn’t see them coming, they’ve lost their skinchanger Orell. He suspects they’ve lost their “baby crow”, too. Then the Thenn turns to Ygritte, and asks Tormund if she belongs to him. She nocks an arrow and replies that she doesn’t belong to anybody. She places the arrow’s tip at his throat. He stares at her for a time, then tells Tormund that she’s too scrawny, not like the crows at Castle Black. He tells Tormund to think of how they must be stuffing themselves, getting nice and fat and marbled… and then moves to the spit, where the Thenns have spitted a human arm. The Thenn leader tells Tormund he knows they’ve had their differences, but once before he dies he ought to try crow.
Men of the Watch at Castle Black practice their archery, aiming at straw targets. Samwell walks past them toward the barracks, where Jon Snow is. Jon tells him of how the last time he saw Robb, it was at Winterfell, and Robb told him the next time they met Jon would be all in black. Jon says he was always jealous of Robb, the way Eddard looked at him, the way Robb was better at everything like fighting, riding, hunting, and girls—the girls loved Robb. Jon wanted to hate his half-brother, but never could. Samwell notes that sometimes he wants to hate Jon, too, because Jon is better at everything as well, except reading. Samwell then tells Jon that “they” are ready for him. Jon says that Thorne’s wanted to hang him for awhile, and now it’s his chance. Samwell protests that they won’t hang him as he’s done nothing wrong. Jon walks away and says that he’s done plenty wrong.
Ser Alliser Thorne presides as a group of Night’s Watch officers question Jon. Thorne asks if Jon admits her murdered Qhorin Halfhand, but Jon denies he murdered him. Teale questions his having put a sword through Qhorin and not calling it murder, but Jon replies that Qhorin wanted him to kill him. At that, Janos Slynt—all in black—notes Jon is the bastard son of a traitor, and one could expect no less. Jon goes on saying that Qhorin believed the only thing they could do to defend the Wall was to get a loyal man into Mance’s army. Thorne tells Jon not to talk about the Halfhand as if he knew him, and that Qhorin was his brother. To that, Jon replies that Thorne should then know that Qhorin would do anything to defend the Wall. The Free Folk might have boiled alive, but by letting Jon kill him instead…
Slynt interrupts, echoing, “The Free Folk?” He shows that Jon even talks like a wildling. Jon agrees, saying he ate with them, climbed the Wall with them. He hesitates, then admits he lay with a wildling girl as well. Slynt asks if Jon admits to breaking his vow, and Jon does so. Slynt insists that the law is the law, and that Jon must die. At this, Maester Aemon speaks up and says that if they beheaded every ranger who lay with a woman, that the Wall would be manned by headless men. Thorne argues that there’s a difference between sneaking to Mole Town’s brothel and laying with the enemy. Jon contends that while they argue, Mance Rayder marches with an army of 100,000. Thorne calls it impossible, saying 50 wildlings can’t get together without killing one another. Jon persists with his 100,000 claim, noting that Mance has united the Thenns, the Hornfoots, the ice river clans, and even has giants fighting for him. Slynt scoffs at that last. Jon asks if Slynt’s ever been beyond the Wall, and instead of answering Slynt says he commanded the City Watch of King’s Landing. “And now you’re here. You must not have been very good at your job,” Jon says. Slynt rises up angrily, asking how he dares, but Jon tells the others that there’s a band of wildlings already south of the Wall, led by Tormund Giantsbane. Jon adds that he killed their skinchanger and three others besides and that it was they who shot him with arrows.
Then Jon informs them of their plan to attack Castle Black from the south while Mance attacks from the north, using a great bonfire to signal the attack. Jon insists it’s the truth, the entire truth. Slynt sits again. Jon then asks if they plan to execute him, or if he’s free to go. Aemon replies that as men of the Watch, none of them are free… but they won’t be taking Jon’s head today. Jon is given leave to go. After he’s gone, Thorne notes he’s acting commander of the Watch, and says he doesn’t trust Jon. Maester Aemon says he knows that Jon told the truth. When Thorne asks how the maester acquired the power to tell when a man lies or tells the truth, the maester replies that he grew up in King’s Landing.
In a garden of the Red Keep, Olenna and Margaery Tyrell examine several golden necklaces on display. Olenna finds them gaudy, saying Margaery will be a queen, not an ox. Olenna points one out in particular, saying that Margaery’s grandfather gave her a very similar necklace on her fifty-first nameday. Then she tosses it aside into the bushes. Margaery notes the wedding is in a fortnight, and that Olenna can’t reject everything. Olenna says she can, then turns to Margaery’s ladies-in-waiting and tells them to speak to the jewellers of King’s Landing. The one who finds the best necklace will get to keep the second best. They rush off, and Margaery and Olenna seat themselves. Olenna tells her that the Margaery who walks into the Great Sept will inspire a thousand songs, and must look the part, not wearing rubbish. Margaery wonders if she should let Joffrey choose the necklace, ending up with a string of dead sparrowheads around her neck. Olenna tells her to watch how she speaks, even in the garden, even with Olenna.
Just then they are interrupted by the arrival of Brienne of Tarth. Olenna is extremely impressed by her, calling her “marvelous”. She notes that she heard Brienne knocked Ser Loras into the dirt “like the silly little boy he is.” Embarassed, Brienne turns to Margaery and asks for a moment.
Walking besides a fountain, Margaery questions, “A shadow?” Brienne swears that it was a shadow with the face of Stannis Baratheon that plunged its sword through Renly’s heart and then disappeared. Brienne promises to one day “avenge our king”, but Margaery notes Joffrey is king now. Brienne says she meant no offense, and Margaery says she’s given none. Margaery takes Brienne’s arm and walks on, past a new sculptor of Joffrey with a crossbow, his foot victoriously placed on a direwolf’s corpse.
In the tower of the Kingsguard, Ser Jaime reviews the security plans for Joffrey’s wedding with Ser Meryn Trant, while Joffrey stands about examining the arms and armor on the walls of the chamber. Jaime notes all the Kingsguard will be on duty, noting Ser Boros Blount will be stationed at one place, and Ser Preston Greenfield will be stationed at the primary entertanment. Jaime asks after Joffrey as the king starts walking. Joffrey claims to have been listening, and so Jaime goes on to say Ser Meryn will guard Tommen and Lady Margaery. Ser Meryn replies he’s always guarded the king himself, and has done so since Jaime’s absence, but Jaime only thanks him for his service. Joffrey says it’s all very good, and he does not expect trouble. Meryn adds that the people love Joffrey, and know who keeps them fed. “Margaery Tyrell, I’ve heard,” Jaime replies sarscastically. Joffrey leaves off examining the great, white book on the table, and says that she does it by his leave, and the people know that Joffrey saved the city and won the war. Jaime retorts that the war is not won, so long as Stannis lives.
“I broke Stannis on the Blackwater,” Joffrey says, and says it’s a pity Jaime was not around to help. Jaime responds that he was busy at the time. Joffrey returns to the book and quips that Jaime was busy being captured… but then notes that this must be the famous Book of the Brothers, containing all the great deeds of all the great Kingsguard. He flips through it and pauses at the entry of Ser Arthur Dayne, the Sword of the Morning. He turns another page, noting how he led forces against the Kingswood Brotherhood and defeated the Smiling Knight in single combat. He turns to another page, of a figure he’s less familiar with: Ser Duncan the Tall. He notes there are four pages connected to the knight, suggesting he was quite the man. “So they say,” Jaime replies. Joffrey turns to Jaime’s page and finds it short, listing none of Jaime’s great deeds. Jaime says there’s time enough. Joffrey questions what a 40-year-old knight with one hand can do, but Jaime quips that it makes it more of a contest. Joffrey smirks and departs with Ser Meryn.
Jaime moves over to the book, examining his eentry for a moment, and then shutting the book with a thump.
The Unsullied march as Missandei and Daenerys look out across Slaver’s Bay. Daenerys asks if Missandei has been to Meereen, and Missandei says she has been there several times. They say a thousand slaves died building the Great Pyramid of Meereen, Missandei reports. Daenerys says in turn that now an army of former slaves marches on her gates. She asks if the Great Masters will be worried, and Missandei says they will be, if they’re smart. Daario Naharis arrives, and though Daenerys reprimands him about his having been ordered to ride at the rear of the train, he insists he has to speak to her on an important matter of strategy. Missandei departs after a look from Daenerys, leaving the two alone.
Daenerys asks what it is, and Daario Naharis pulls out a dusk rose. She rolls her eyes and asks if he means to walk at the back of the train instead. He then offers her a flower called lady’s lace, and she suggests he must want to walk without shoes. Finally he informs her that she must know a land to rule it and its people. He notes dusk rose tea is used to reduce fever, especially the slaves who make it. He offers another flower, harpy’s gold, which is beautiful but poisonous. He then presents all three to Daenerys, who replies that he’s a gambler… but she takes the flowers from his hand. He excuses himself after that, and she watches him leave.
Then there’s shouts that lead Daenerys to find what the matter is.
Ser Jorah and Ser Barristan look at something as Missandei and Daenerys approach. Daenerys sees it as well, stops for a moment, and then goes forward—it is a dead child on a cross, its hand pointing the way to Meereen. Jorah notes that there is one at every mile marker on the way to Meereen. Daenerys asks how many miles there are to Meereen: 163, Jorah says. Barristan says he’ll command men to go ahead of the column and bury the bodies, as Daenerys does not need to see such a thing, but Daenerys refuses and says he’ll do no such thing. She insists resolutely on seeing every victim’s face. Then she tells them to remove the dead girl’s slave collar before they bury her.
As Sansa sits silently by the sea, Brienne and Jaime watch from a distance. Brienne reminds Jaime that he made a promise. Jaime admits he did, but Catelyn is now dead. Brienne reminds him that he also promised to see them safe. At that, Jaime notes that Arya Stark has not been seen since Eddard Stark was killed, and he supposes she’s dead… while Sansa is now Sansa Lannister, which makes a complication. Brienne insists that does not relieve him of his vow, but he asks what she wants him to do—kidnap his sister-in-law and then take her… where? Where, he asks, is safer than King’s Landing? Brienne tells Jaime to look her in the eye and tell her that her truly believes Sansa will be safe in King’s Landing. Jaime hesitates… and looks away. But then he looks back and asks if Brienne is not in fact a relation, as every Lannister he’s seen since his return has been a “miserable pain in my ass.” He notes she has the hair for it, if not the looks.
They depart, but after they go, it’s clear someone else was watching them. Sansa looks up, and sees nothing.
Walking alone up the hill from the sea, Sansa hears a rustling among the trees. She becomes anxious and starts to move quickly, until she’s suddenly startled by realizing someone is following her. He grabs her shoulder, frightening her, and the man stumbles back, telling her it’s all right. She notes he’s drunk. He admits he is, and he has good reason to be. He was once a knight, he says, but now he is just a fool. Then he asks if Sansa knows him… and she does recognize him as Ser Dontos Hollard, from the king’s nameday celebration. She apologizes for not recognizing him, but he says none are necessary; he may be a fool, but he’s a living fool thanks to her. She says anyone would have done the same to spare him Joffrey’s wrath, but he notes only she did. Dontos then notes he has nothing to repay her with… except one thing. He pulls a necklace from a pouch, telling her it’s worth more than his life and once belonged to his mother, and her mother before her. IT came from a time when the Hollards were a strong house, a house on the rise, and that the necklace is all that is left of those days thanks to some “fat, sad drunks like me”.
Sansa says she can’t take it, but he insists that she take it and wear it, giving his name one more moment in the sun before it fades. Sansa says she will wear it with pride.
On a forest road where bodies and looted wagons lie strewn, the Hound and Arya ride on, ignoring them. Arya asks when she’ll get a horse of her own, and Sandor mocks her, saying “little lady wants a pony.” She says she wants away from his stench. He then notes horses aren’t easy to come by… and even if he could, he wouldn’t put her on her own horse when she’s the only thing of value left to him in the world. She questions his having failed to steal anything from Joffrey when he left, but he replies he’s no thief when she suggests he’s not smart. She remarks that killing little boys is fine by him, but thieving is beneath him. “A man’s got to have a code,” he replies. She then asks if he thinks she’ll escape, and notes she has nowhere to go, and no family. Sandor replies she has her rich aunt Lysa in the Vale. “Once I sell you to her, maybe she’ll have enough left over to buy you that pony you want so much,” he tells her.
As they look at an occupied inn, Arya notes that she and he are both hungry. The Hound replies he counts five horses, which means five men, more than he feels like killing on an empty stomach. Two of the men walk out of the inn to relieve themselves. Arya tells Sandor that she recognizes one as Polliver, who captured her and her companions, taking them to Harrenhal. She adds he killed Lommy. The Hound asks, “What the fuck’s a Lommy?” She replies that he was her friend, and that Polliver stole her sword and pushed it through Lommy’s throat. Then she sees he still has her sword, Needle. The Hound mocks her having named her sword. “Lots of people name their swords,” she says. “Lots of cunts,” he retorts. He looks over to her… and sees she’s snuck off.
He chases after her as she approaches the inn, and stops her just before entering, but a Lannister soldier inside the inn opens the door and sees them. The Hound is forced to let her enter, and enters with her. As some of the men molest a serving girl, others pause to stare at their entry. Polliver tells the men to leave off. He watches them pass by and take a seat. As the men return to their assault, the innkeep begs Polliver to intervene, as the girl is a good girl. Polliver tells him to shut up and pour more ale, and then they may not take her with them “when we’re done with her.”
Then Polliver recognizes one of the two newcomers. Arya, thinking he recognizes her, reaches for the hilt of the Hound’s sword… but it’s the Hound that Polliver recognizes. He joins them at the table, and tells the innkeep to pour them some ale. He asks what the Hound is doing so far north. The Hound asks the same, and rejects Polliver’s suggestion that they’re keeping the king’s peace, as the war is over. Polliver agrees, and says he’s been stuck with the Hound’s brother while all the real fighting has happened. He quickly says he means no offense—the Hound indicates he’s taken none—and says the Mountain is great at what he does, but it’s nothing but torture, torture, and more torture of prisoners.
Polliver asks what life is without some fun… and then glancing at Arya, suggests that he doesn’t have to tell the Hound that. “I’ve had better,” Sandor replies to the crude implication. Then Polliver suggests they should join his company, that there’ll be plenty of opportunities to torture men and women into giving them gold, silver, daughters, and anything else the men want between where they are and King’s Landing. The Hound replies that he’s not going to the city. Polliver tries to argue they can do whatever they want, wherever they go, because they wear the king’s colors. “Fuck the king,” Sandor replies. The inn grows quiet.
Polliver reports that he had heard that the Hound had run at the Blackwater, but he hadn’t believed it until now. The Hound tells him to bring him a chicken. Polliver asks if the Hound plans to pay for it, and when the Hound replies that Polliver paid for it, the soldier chuckles and says no, they didn’t—but they’re the king’s men. Then he asks if the Hound has money. Sandor says he hasn’t got a penny, so Polliver offers a trade: one of their “ittle chickens” for his, looking at Arya. The Hound stares at him and then calls Polliver a talker, and that listening to talkers makes him thirsty. He reaches over the table, takes Polliver’s mug of ale, and empties it. He also notes he’s hungry, and now demands two chickens. Polliver looks back at his men, and then tells Clegane that he doesn’t understand the situation. “I understand if any more words come pouring out of your cunt mouth,” the Hound replies, “I’ll have to eat every chicken in this room.”
Polliver wonders how a man who lived his life for the king would be willing to die for some chickens. “Someone is,” Sandor finishes. Then Polliver springs up from his seat, drawing his sword, but teh Hound knocks him down. He forces down another man, slashes a third, and tangles with two more as the soldiers try to overwhelm him. They begin to force him back, and then down to the ground, kicking at him, but he fights his way free. He forces one man to stab his own compatriot in the groin and then, struggling with that man, repeatedly forces the man’s face down on to his own dagger. Clegane struggles up… only for one man to be struggling up as well.
Arya, having watched silently all the while, leaps forward and taking up a mug smashes it over the man’s head. Taking his sword, she casually shoves it into his chest. Then turning, she sees Polliver stumbling toward the Hound with a drawn knife. She slashes him across the legs, driving him to his knees, then throws aside the sword so that she can pull Needle from Polliver’s belt. The soldier falls onto his face as the Hound kills one of the last surviving soldiers. Polliver turns as Arya begins to repeat, word for word, the words Polliver said to Lommy before he killed him. And just like Polliver killed Lommy, she slowly shoves Needle through his throat, leaving him to choke on his own blood. Arya wipes the blade on her sleeve as Polliver dies.
The Hound is then seen riding out of the wood, eating a leg of chicken… and behind him rides Arya on her own horse, taken from the dead men. She smiles as they ride on into a burning wasteland where mountains climb in the distance.
Recap
The camera tracks up over a wolf pelt scabbard to reveal Ice—not seen for a very long time on the show—as someone draws it. It is Tywin Lannister. He studies it a moment and gives it to a smith who proceeds to separate the hilt from the blade, and then places the blade into a firey forge. The steel melts and is poured into two molds, one longer, one shorter. Lord Tywin takes up the wolf pelt and throws it into the fire afterwards.
Jaime Lannister, dressed in his Kingsguard armor, admires a golden-hilted longsword of Valyrian steel as his father looks on. Jaime remarks it looks freshly forged, and Tywin admits it is. Jaime questions this as no one has made Valyrian steel since the Doom of Valyria, but Tywin replies that there are three smiths who can rework Valyrian steel, and the finest of them was invited from Volantis. Jaime wonders where the Valyrian steel came from, and Tywin merely remarks that it was from someone who no longer had need of it. Jaime admires the blade further and comments that his father has long wanted to have such a sword in the family… and Tywin notes that they now have two, pointing out that the original weapon as “absurdly large” and had steel enough for two swords.
Jaime thanks his father, calling it glorious. Tywin eyes his son and suggests he’ll have to train his left hand to wield such a blade. Jaime is flippant about it, saying any decent swordsman can fight with either hand, but Tywin points out that he’ll never be as good with his left as he was with his right. Jaime agrees, but so long as he’s still better than everyone else, he can live with it. Lord Tywin then tells his son that with one hand, he can no longer serve in the Kingsguard. Ser Jaime immediately questions it, insisting he will remain in the Kingsguard because the oath is for life. Tywin tries to argue that the war is done and Joffrey is safe, but Jaime denies Joffrey’s safety, stating that there are many people in the city who would be glad to see him dead.
Tywin ignores Jaime’s protests and informs him that there are other knights who can protect Joffrey while Jaime returns home, informing him that he wants him to go to Casterly Rock and rule there as Tywin’s heir, as Tywin does not expect to ever see the Rock again now that he is Hand of the King. Jaime walks away from his father, and says that he is called “Kingslayer, oathbreaker, man without honor,” but that now his father wants him to break another sacred vow. At that, Tywin replies no vows will be broken, as there is precedence for relieving a Kingsguard of his duties (since Joffrey removed Barristan Selmy from his office). Jaime replies, “No.” Tywin argues, and though Jaime says that his honor is beyond hope of repair, he still does not want Casterly Rock, a wife, or children.
“What do you want?” Tywin then asks, sharply. “Supper would be nice,” Jaime replies. Tywin complains that for 40 years he has tried to teach his son, and Jaime has never learned. He then curtly commands him to go, that if the sum of his ambitions are to serve as a glorified bodyguard, then he should go and serve. Jaime supposes his father will want him to return the Valyrian steel sword… but Tywin does tell him to keep it, suggesting, “A one-handed man with no family needs all the help he can get.” Jaime leaves with the sword.
Outside the walls of King’s Landing, Tyrion Lannister stands with Podrick Payne holding Joffrey’s banner and a seated, drinking Ser Bronn. Behind them are a company of goldcloaks. As a wayfarer passes by with some goats, Bronn asks, “How many Dornishmen does it take to fuck a goat?” Tyrion asks him to stop. Bronn complains about not having been able to meet the person they’re waiting for in a tavern, but Tyrion replies that they are awaiting the Prince of Dorne, not some sellsword friend of Bronn’s. Bronn questions his importance, wondering why they would send Tyrion to meet him rather than someone else more favored by the king. Tyrion replies that there’s bad blood between the Martells of Dorne and the Lannisters of Casterly Rock. That leads Bronn to suppose that in case the Martells want to spill some of that Lannister blood, Tyrion would be no great loss. Tyrion takes umbrage at this and replies that he’s accomplished restaurant.
Then word arrives of the approach of the people they’re awaiting. The company of men in colorful, rich robes bears banners of various houses of Dorne, and Podrick shows some accomplishment with heraldry, identifying the lemons of House Dalt of Lemonwood, the vulture and baby of House Blackmont, the crowned skull of House Manwoody of Kingsgrave. Tyrion asks if he sees the red sun pierced by a spear of House Martell, but Podrick cannot see it. Tyrion moves forward with trepidation to greet the rider at its head. When Tyrion notes that he does not see Prince Doran in their company, the Dornishman replies that Prince Doran’s health did not permit him to make the journey, so he has sent his brother Prince Oberyn in his stead. It’s clear that this troubles Tyrion, but he presses on, saying that Joffrey will be pleased to have the company of such a renowned warrior at his wedding. The Dornishman replies, “Will he?”
Tyrion asks Oberyn’s whereabouts, and the Dornishman reveals that he is .. and then asks where Oberyn is. The Dornishman reveals that Oberyn arrived before dawn and was not fond of welcome parties. Tyrion ushers them into the city and the Dornishmen press on without waiting for the rest of his words. As Tyrion turns back to the city, Bronn remarks sarcastically that that was accomplished diplomacy. Bronn then asks what they’re doing next. Tyrion replies that they must find Oberyn before he kills someone, or several someones, and then asks Bronn that if you’re famous for “fucking half of Westeros” and just arrived after a long journey, where would he go? Bronn says he’d go to sleep, but he’s getting old.
In Littlefinger’s brothel, Prince Oberyn Martell is examining three of his prostitutes under the watchful eye of Oliver(????), who now openly works for Littlefinger. Reclining on a bed with a cup of wine in her hand is a Dornishwoman. Oberyn asks he show finds the first prostitute, and she replies she is beautiful, but pale. As he undresses the prostitute, he remarks that they like them pale in King’s Landing as it shows they do not work the fields. Oberyn asks the woman if he frightens her, and she shakes her head but doesn’t dare speak. The woman dismisses her, calling her timid and that timidity bores her. Oberyn goes to the next prostitute and looking at her remarks she’s a bit of mischief. Oberyn tells the Dornishwoman that the prostitute seems to like her, and she replies that she has good taste. Oberyn fondles the girl and suggests she’s not timid at all, leading the woman to boldly go forward toward Dornishwoman and shows herself to be very flexible. The Dornishwoman laughs with delight: “Not timid!” She goes forward to get closer to the prostitute, when Oberyn asks the prostitute if she likes women. She replies that she does when they look like the Dornishwoman. The Dornishwoman is quite pleased, and touches her as Oberyn kisses Dornishwoman’s shoulder.
Oliver says, “Very well, my lady.” At that the Dornishwoman protests saying she is no lady. He explains that it is merely a courtesy in the establishment, but she says it’s a lie anywhere. She is a bastard, she says, and the girl is a whore, and Oliver is… a procurer? Oliver moves to asking if anything else is needed, and Oberyn tells him that the other girls can leave… but that he should stay. Oliver notes he’s not on offer, but Oberyn disagrees, saying anyone who works for Littlefinger is on offer. The prince commands him to remove his clothes and that they’ll be busy for a time. Then he turns to him and says he is a prince, and asks if Oliver has ever been with a prince. Oliver replies that he hasn’t… but notes he is wildly expensive. As the prostitute and Dornishwoman disport in the bed, Oliver asks which way Oberyn likes it. Oberyn fondles him forcefully and replies, “My way.”
Just then, however, he is distracted by a voice singing “The Rains of Castamere”. Dornishwoman, hearing it, disentangles herself from the prostitute and starts, “Oberyn? Oberyn, don’t.” He ignores her, striding off, and she follows after him anxiously.
In another room in the brothel, two Lannister guards have prostitues seated on their laps. One of them is the singer. Oberyn interrupts them, entering the room casually, at one point running his hand over a candle flame. Oberyn asks them to forgive him for staring, but he does not see many Lannisters from where he’s from. The second guard replies that they don’t see many Dornishmen in King’s Landing, to which Oberyn replies that they don’t care for the smell. Dornishwoman arrives then, rushing to Oberyn’s side and clinging to him as she urges him to come away with her. As Oliver attempts to offer a private room to Oberyn, sensing trouble, the first guard tells Oliver that he’s wasting Dornishwoman on a Dornishman—assuming her to be one of the brothel’s prositutes—and suggests he get him “a shaveed goat and a bottle of olive oil.” The guards laugh, but Oberyn does not. He then asks the men while all the world hates a Lannister. He approaches them, and they stand up. He answers that they think their gold, their lions, and their gold lions make them better than anyone. But then he tells them a secret: they are not golden lions, and that the first guard is just a “pink little man who is far too slow on the draw.”
There’s a tense moment… and then the guard goes for his sword, but Martell is far quicker, stabbing a dagger through his wrist. Oberyn tells him a long sword is a bad option in such close quarters… then looks to the second guard, his sword half-drawn, and warns him that if he has to pull the dagger it will lead to far more bleeding ... but that the man will live, if he goes and gets help immediately. He smiles, as the first guard screams in agony.
Just then, Tyrion enters, greeting Oberyn and asking him to forgive the intrusion… befor realizing what’s going on. The second guard sheathes his sword, and Oberyn draws his dagger and sheathes it. The guards stumble away as the Dornishwoman goes up to Oberyn. The prince apologizes to her, calling her his love, and the two seem to forget Tyrion’s presence, unable to keep hands or mouths off one another. Tyrion speaks up after an awkward silence, informing Oberyn that he’s there to welcome him. The two do not respond at first, but then introduces the Dornishwoman as Ellaria Sand, his paramour, and then identifies Tyrion as the Imp, the son of Tywin Lannister. Tyrion asks for Oberyn to let him know if there’s anything he can do to make the stay in King’s Landing more pleasant… but Oberyn ignores him, and instead asks if Bronn is Tyrion’s hired killer. He replies it started that way, but now he’s a knight. The prince asks how that came to pass, and Bronn says that he killed the right people. Oberyn laughs at that, and tells Oliver to fetch more girls, asking if the men want to join them. Tyrion shakes his head, and Bronn nods. Oberyn asks if Tyrion doesn’t partake, and Tyrion replies that he’s now married. He then asks a private word with Oberyn.
Outside the brothel, Oberyn remarks that he visited the Lannister brothel by mistake. Tyrion replies they take all kinds, to which Oberyn says, “Even Dornishmen.” Tyrion presses on, saying that the king is very grateful. Oberyn doubts that, saying that Joffrey is offended, as Oberyn is only the second son. Tyrion notes that as a second son himself, he’s used to being the family insult. Oberyn chuckles. When Tyrion asks why Oberyn came, Oberyn says he was invited to the wedding, but Tyrion doubts that. The Dornish prince eyes him and then says that the last time he was in King’s Landing, it was for the wedding of his sister Elia to Prince Rhaegar Targaryen, “the last dragon.” Tyrion seems uncomfortable with that, but it’s clear it’s because a pair of City Watch men are just passing, as if to talk of such things requires secrecy. Oberyn goes on that she loved Rhaegar, bore his children, fed them at her own breast and adored them so much even the wet nurse could not touch them… but then “beautiful, noble Rhaegar Targaryen” left her for another woman and started a war that ended in King’s Landing when Tywin’s army took the city.
Tyrion starts to clarify some point about Tywin’s role but Oberyn speaks over him, saying that the children were butchered and wrapped up in Lannister cloaks. He then asks Tyrion if he knows what they did to Elia. Tyrion looks down, and Oberyn puts his hand under his chin and forces him to look at him: “I am asking you a question.” Tyrion pushes the hand away as he says only that he’s heard rumors. Oberyn says he has heard them as well… but the one he keeps hearing is that Ser Gregor Clegane, the Mountain that Rides, raped her and then split her in half with his greatsword. Tyrion says he was not there and that he doesn’t know anything. Oberyn goes on to say that if the Mountain killed Princess Elia, it was at Tywin’s orders… and then tells Tyrion to inform Tywin that he is there because “the Lannisters are not the only ones who pay their debts.” He then walks back to the brothel.
On the shore of Slaver’s Bay, Daenerys sits on a rock watching two of her dragons playing with one another in the sky, while Drogon—grown much larger since last seen—rests his head in her lap as she rubs his head. It is an idyllic moment. Jorah Mormont comes into view, watching as the two dragons come closer and reveal themselves to have been fighting over the carcass of a lamb which drops from their talons to the ground near Daenerys and Drogon. As the two fly down and fight over it, Drogon plunges in. Daenerys reaches for him, and he suddenly turns at her and snarls dangerously before seeming to pull away and leave the carcass to the other dragons. They fly off as Drogon screams after them, and then launches himself into the air. Jorah climbs up the rock as Daenerys watches the dragons with trepidation. Ser Jorah tells her they’re dragons, and cannot be tamed, even by their mother.
Ser Jorah and Daenerys are seen walking past serried ranks of the Unsullied and join Ser Barristan Selmy and Missandei. Daenerys wonders where Daario Naharis and Grey Worm are, and Selmy says they are gambling. This surprises Daenerys, and she goes to investigate as Selmy nods in the direction of the two men. Daenerys continues on past her thousands of Unsullied.
Passing through a camp of her freed slaves, many of them bowing to her and calling after her, “Mhysa”, Daenerys comes to find Naharis and Grey Worm sitting before one another, each holding a blade on outstretched arms. Daenerys asks how long they have been at it, and Missandei says it started at midnight. Naharis remarks that Grey Worm is stronger than he looks but that his arms are beginning to shake. Daenerys asks what the prize is in the “stupid contest”, to watch Daario replies that the winner will have the honor riding at her side as they march on Meereen. Daenerys responds that that honor will go to Ser Jorah and Ser Barristan, as neither kept her waiting. She informs them they will ride in the rearguard and guard livestock as she turns to go—but neither man stops, so she adds that the last man holding his sword can find a new queen to fight for. Both men drop their weapons simultaneously.
As Daario and Grey Worm get up, Daario noticed Grey Worm’s looks at Missandei and asks in Valyrian if he likes her. The Unsullied officer replies that Naharis is not a smart man, to which Naharis replies that he’d rather have no brains and two balls.
In King’s Landing, Shae serves a meal to a morose Sansa, who refuses to eat and ignores entreaties for her to try something. Shae even tries lemon cakes, to no effectg. Tyrion arrives and at Shae’s prompting tells Sansa she must eat, but Sansa refuses. Tyrion asks for a moment alone with his wife; a servant leaves, and after awhile Shae does as well. Tyrion sits with Sansa, holding her hand, and insists he can’t let her starve as he swore to protect her. He wants to help her, he says. and at that Sansa asks how he can help her. She notes she lies awake all night, thinking about the deaths of her brother and mother. Tyrion suggests he could get a potion to help her sleep, but Sansa presses on, asking if he knows what they did to Robb, how they sewed Grey Wind’s head to his body, and how they cut Catelyn’s throat to the bone and threw her body into the river.
Tyrion says what happened was a terrible crime. He did not know Robb, but he seemed like a good man. As to Catelyn, he says he admired her despite her wanting to execute him. She was strong, he says, and fierce when protecting her children. He tells Sansa that Catelyn would want her to carry on. Sansa fights back tears and excuses herself, saying she wishes to visit the Godswood. Tyrion says prayer can be helpful, but she notes she no longer prays and that it’s simply the only place where she is left alone and no one talks to her.
Tyrion enters his chambers to find Shae reclining in his bed. She tries to entice him into bed with her, kissing and fondling him, but he explains matters are tense. When she questions it, he lists various reasons for his tension: Joffrey wants to murder him, his wife hates him, Oberyn Martell wants to murder everyone whose last name is Lannister. She insists he should relax, and puts his hand between her thighs. He almost succumbs, but pulls away. He insists it’s not a good time, and she replies it’s never a good time, suggesting his child bride is the reason for his reticence. He stops her from going further, but she asks if he loves Sansa. He says he barely knows her, that she’s a child, and that she despises him. She claims that’s no answer, but he retorts that it is. She then accuses him of offering her diamonds to ship her away, obliquely refering to Varys’s approach. Tyrion does not know what she is talking about. She insists that if he wants her to leave, to say so to her face, but he still says he has no idea what she means. Then she asks him to say that he wants her to stay… but he can’t say that. She departs angrily… but outside, hidden behind a pillar, is a woman of the court who overheard the argument.
The former maester Qyburn helps Jaime put on a large, golden hand on his stump. Qyburn admires the workmanship, leading Jaime to suggest that he can chop off his own hand and take it for his own. Cersei, pouring a glass of wine, tells him not to be an ingrate and claims she spent days working with the goldsmith on every detail. Jaime questions that, and she admits it was just the better part of an afternoon. Qyburn asks how it feels, and Jaime suggests a hook would be more practical. Cersei considers the hand elegant, however. Qyburn makes to leave, and Cersei thanks him for helping her with “that other matter”. When he asks after her symptoms, she says they are gone completely. She thanks him as a maester, but he reminds her he isn’t one yet is still happy to help. He leaves, and Jaime tells Cersei he’s an odd little man. She admits she’s grown fond of him, and that he’s quite talented.
Jaime asks what the symptoms were, as Cersei pours herself another glass of wine, and she tells him that they do not concern him. Jaime asks if Qyburn touched her to examine her, and she wonders if he’s jealous. Jaime merely says he’s surprised, since Cersei never allowed Pycelle let her. She laughs and indicates she’d never let “that old lecher” put his hands on her; besides, he smells like a dead cat. Jaime notes he’s never smelled a dead cat, and she replies they smell like Pycelle. Then, changing the subject, Jaime notes that Cersei drinks more than she used to. She admits it. When he questions it, she notes that Jaime’s disappearance after his brawl with Eddard stark, Robert’s tragic death while hunting—Jaime sarcastically suggests that must have been traumatic—and her only daughter was shipped away to Dorne, plus having gone through a siege (rather a short one) and then having to wed her eldest son to a “little bitch” from Highgarden and while she herself is supposed to marry her brother, a renowned “pillowbiter”.
Jaime joins her where she’s seated, and notes Tywin disowned him. She doubts that, noting that Jaime is all he has. Jaime points out that she’s forgotten Tyrion. She pauses and then asks if he truly means to stay in the Kingsguard. He notes that it means he will be able to stay in the Red Keep with her, and starts to nuzzle her neck. She stands up abruptly, telling him not now. He questions when, noting that he’s been in the city for weeks now. Cersei walks away from him and says nothing. He realizes something has changed, to which she replies, “Everything’s changed!” His return without an apology and with a missing hand and expects everything to be the same. Jaime wonders what he should apologize for, and she replies he should have apologized for leaving her. When he questions whether she thought he wanted to be captured, she coldly replies that she doesn’t know what he wanted, as he wasnt’ there. “You left me. Alone,” she repeats. Jaime says that every day he plotted to escape, and murdered people to get back to her. But she stops him, telling him he took too long. He asks what she means, but she does not clarify.
A knock at the door interrupts them. Jaime tells them to go away, but Cersei calls them in. The court woman who witnessed Shae’s departure from Tyrion’s chamber apologizes for interrupting them, but tells Cersei she was told to come to her if there was anything important.
In a ravine in the North, the wildlings under Tormund Giantsbane are encamped. Ygritte fletches arrows, and Tormund comes up to her and ask if she means to kill all the crows herself. She retorts by asking if he means to just sit there, scratching his balls until witner. He replies that he’s waiting for Mance’s orders, but she notes that if the messenger he sent back over the Wall during a full moon hasn’t come back yet, he never will come back. Tormund questions if she wants to march on Castle Black with just the few men they have when her “pretty crow” is there with a 1,000 men. She says Jon Snow is a liar, but Tormund stops her—she uses “is”, not “was”, and notes she reported putting three arrows in Jon. She insists he did, and to that Tormund replies that he’s seen her hit a rabbit in the eye from 200 yards… so if Jon survived those arrows, it’s because she wanted him to escape.
Then a wildling lookout whistles, alerting them to someone approaching. A group of bald widllings with ritual scars across their heads and faces approach, led by one man. Tormund calls them Thenns, and says he hates them as he puts his sword away. The leader of the Thenns indicates that Mance sent them, and when Tormund asks how they found them, the leader looks to another man—a Thenn skinchanger, with an owl on his shoulder. Tormund notes that they’ve come from the south, not the north, but the Thenn leader replies that they took a detour to get some food from a village in that direction. The other Thenns move past them to take over the cooking fire where the wildlings have spitted some rabbits. The Thenn leader wonders why the meat tastes so much better south of the Wall, but rejects Tormund’s offer of partaking in the meat they already have.
The Thenn leader guesses everything is better fed in the south, fat and lazy… which makes it easier for them. Then the Thenn guesses that since they didn’t see them coming, they’ve lost their skinchanger Orell. He suspects they’ve lost their “baby crow”, too. Then the Thenn turns to Ygritte, and asks Tormund if she belongs to him. She nocks an arrow and replies that she doesn’t belong to anybody. She places the arrow’s tip at his throat. He stares at her for a time, then tells Tormund that she’s too scrawny, not like the crows at Castle Black. He tells Tormund to think of how they must be stuffing themselves, getting nice and fat and marbled… and then moves to the spit, where the Thenns have spitted a human arm. The Thenn leader tells Tormund he knows they’ve had their differences, but once before he dies he ought to try crow.
Men of the Watch at Castle Black practice their archery, aiming at straw targets. Samwell walks past them toward the barracks, where Jon Snow is. Jon tells him of how the last time he saw Robb, it was at Winterfell, and Robb told him the next time they met Jon would be all in black. Jon says he was always jealous of Robb, the way Eddard looked at him, the way Robb was better at everything like fighting, riding, hunting, and girls—the girls loved Robb. Jon wanted to hate his half-brother, but never could. Samwell notes that sometimes he wants to hate Jon, too, because Jon is better at everything as well, except reading. Samwell then tells Jon that “they” are ready for him. Jon says that Thorne’s wanted to hang him for awhile, and now it’s his chance. Samwell protests that they won’t hang him as he’s done nothing wrong. Jon walks away and says that he’s done plenty wrong.
Ser Alliser Thorne presides as a group of Night’s Watch officers question Jon. Thorne asks if Jon admits her murdered Qhorin Halfhand, but Jon denies he murdered him. Teale questions his having put a sword through Qhorin and not calling it murder, but Jon replies that Qhorin wanted him to kill him. At that, Janos Slynt—all in black—notes Jon is the bastard son of a traitor, and one could expect no less. Jon goes on saying that Qhorin believed the only thing they could do to defend the Wall was to get a loyal man into Mance’s army. Thorne tells Jon not to talk about the Halfhand as if he knew him, and that Qhorin was his brother. To that, Jon replies that Thorne should then know that Qhorin would do anything to defend the Wall. The Free Folk might have boiled alive, but by letting Jon kill him instead…
Slynt interrupts, echoing, “The Free Folk?” He shows that Jon even talks like a wildling. Jon agrees, saying he ate with them, climbed the Wall with them. He hesitates, then admits he lay with a wildling girl as well. Slynt asks if Jon admits to breaking his vow, and Jon does so. Slynt insists that the law is the law, and that Jon must die. At this, Maester Aemon speaks up and says that if they beheaded every ranger who lay with a woman, that the Wall would be manned by headless men. Thorne argues that there’s a difference between sneaking to Mole Town’s brothel and laying with the enemy. Jon contends that while they argue, Mance Rayder marches with an army of 100,000. Thorne calls it impossible, saying 50 wildlings can’t get together without killing one another. Jon persists with his 100,000 claim, noting that Mance has united the Thenns, the Hornfoots, the ice river clans, and even has giants fighting for him. Slynt scoffs at that last. Jon asks if Slynt’s ever been beyond the Wall, and instead of answering Slynt says he commanded the City Watch of King’s Landing. “And now you’re here. You must not have been very good at your job,” Jon says. Slynt rises up angrily, asking how he dares, but Jon tells the others that there’s a band of wildlings already south of the Wall, led by Tormund Giantsbane. Jon adds that he killed their skinchanger and three others besides and that it was they who shot him with arrows.
Then Jon informs them of their plan to attack Castle Black from the south while Mance attacks from the north, using a great bonfire to signal the attack. Jon insists it’s the truth, the entire truth. Slynt sits again. Jon then asks if they plan to execute him, or if he’s free to go. Aemon replies that as men of the Watch, none of them are free… but they won’t be taking Jon’s head today. Jon is given leave to go. After he’s gone, Thorne notes he’s acting commander of the Watch, and says he doesn’t trust Jon. Maester Aemon says he knows that Jon told the truth. When Thorne asks how the maester acquired the power to tell when a man lies or tells the truth, the maester replies that he grew up in King’s Landing.
In a garden of the Red Keep, Olenna and Margaery Tyrell examine several golden necklaces on display. Olenna finds them gaudy, saying Margaery will be a queen, not an ox. Olenna points one out in particular, saying that Margaery’s grandfather gave her a very similar necklace on her fifty-first nameday. Then she tosses it aside into the bushes. Margaery notes the wedding is in a fortnight, and that Olenna can’t reject everything. Olenna says she can, then turns to Margaery’s ladies-in-waiting and tells them to speak to the jewellers of King’s Landing. The one who finds the best necklace will get to keep the second best. They rush off, and Margaery and Olenna seat themselves. Olenna tells her that the Margaery who walks into the Great Sept will inspire a thousand songs, and must look the part, not wearing rubbish. Margaery wonders if she should let Joffrey choose the necklace, ending up with a string of dead sparrowheads around her neck. Olenna tells her to watch how she speaks, even in the garden, even with Olenna.
Just then they are interrupted by the arrival of Brienne of Tarth. Olenna is extremely impressed by her, calling her “marvelous”. She notes that she heard Brienne knocked Ser Loras into the dirt “like the silly little boy he is.” Embarassed, Brienne turns to Margaery and asks for a moment.
Walking besides a fountain, Margaery questions, “A shadow?” Brienne swears that it was a shadow with the face of Stannis Baratheon that plunged its sword through Renly’s heart and then disappeared. Brienne promises to one day “avenge our king”, but Margaery notes Joffrey is king now. Brienne says she meant no offense, and Margaery says she’s given none. Margaery takes Brienne’s arm and walks on, past a new sculptor of Joffrey with a crossbow, his foot victoriously placed on a direwolf’s corpse.
In the tower of the Kingsguard, Ser Jaime reviews the security plans for Joffrey’s wedding with Ser Meryn Trant, while Joffrey stands about examining the arms and armor on the walls of the chamber. Jaime notes all the Kingsguard will be on duty, noting Ser Boros Blount will be stationed at one place, and Ser Preston Greenfield will be stationed at the primary entertanment. Jaime asks after Joffrey as the king starts walking. Joffrey claims to have been listening, and so Jaime goes on to say Ser Meryn will guard Tommen and Lady Margaery. Ser Meryn replies he’s always guarded the king himself, and has done so since Jaime’s absence, but Jaime only thanks him for his service. Joffrey says it’s all very good, and he does not expect trouble. Meryn adds that the people love Joffrey, and know who keeps them fed. “Margaery Tyrell, I’ve heard,” Jaime replies sarscastically. Joffrey leaves off examining the great, white book on the table, and says that she does it by his leave, and the people know that Joffrey saved the city and won the war. Jaime retorts that the war is not won, so long as Stannis lives.
“I broke Stannis on the Blackwater,” Joffrey says, and says it’s a pity Jaime was not around to help. Jaime responds that he was busy at the time. Joffrey returns to the book and quips that Jaime was busy being captured… but then notes that this must be the famous Book of the Brothers, containing all the great deeds of all the great Kingsguard. He flips through it and pauses at the entry of Ser Arthur Dayne, the Sword of the Morning. He turns another page, noting how he led forces against the Kingswood Brotherhood and defeated the Smiling Knight in single combat. He turns to another page, of a figure he’s less familiar with: Ser Duncan the Tall. He notes there are four pages connected to the knight, suggesting he was quite the man. “So they say,” Jaime replies. Joffrey turns to Jaime’s page and finds it short, listing none of Jaime’s great deeds. Jaime says there’s time enough. Joffrey questions what a 40-year-old knight with one hand can do, but Jaime quips that it makes it more of a contest. Joffrey smirks and departs with Ser Meryn.
Jaime moves over to the book, examining his eentry for a moment, and then shutting the book with a thump.
The Unsullied march as Missandei and Daenerys look out across Slaver’s Bay. Daenerys asks if Missandei has been to Meereen, and Missandei says she has been there several times. They say a thousand slaves died building the Great Pyramid of Meereen, Missandei reports. Daenerys says in turn that now an army of former slaves marches on her gates. She asks if the Great Masters will be worried, and Missandei says they will be, if they’re smart. Daario Naharis arrives, and though Daenerys reprimands him about his having been ordered to ride at the rear of the train, he insists he has to speak to her on an important matter of strategy. Missandei departs after a look from Daenerys, leaving the two alone.
Daenerys asks what it is, and Daario Naharis pulls out a dusk rose. She rolls her eyes and asks if he means to walk at the back of the train instead. He then offers her a flower called lady’s lace, and she suggests he must want to walk without shoes. Finally he informs her that she must know a land to rule it and its people. He notes dusk rose tea is used to reduce fever, especially the slaves who make it. He offers another flower, harpy’s gold, which is beautiful but poisonous. He then presents all three to Daenerys, who replies that he’s a gambler… but she takes the flowers from his hand. He excuses himself after that, and she watches him leave.
Then there’s shouts that lead Daenerys to find what the matter is.
Ser Jorah and Ser Barristan look at something as Missandei and Daenerys approach. Daenerys sees it as well, stops for a moment, and then goes forward—it is a dead child on a cross, its hand pointing the way to Meereen. Jorah notes that there is one at every mile marker on the way to Meereen. Daenerys asks how many miles there are to Meereen: 163, Jorah says. Barristan says he’ll command men to go ahead of the column and bury the bodies, as Daenerys does not need to see such a thing, but Daenerys refuses and says he’ll do no such thing. She insists resolutely on seeing every victim’s face. Then she tells them to remove the dead girl’s slave collar before they bury her.
As Sansa sits silently by the sea, Brienne and Jaime watch from a distance. Brienne reminds Jaime that he made a promise. Jaime admits he did, but Catelyn is now dead. Brienne reminds him that he also promised to see them safe. At that, Jaime notes that Arya Stark has not been seen since Eddard Stark was killed, and he supposes she’s dead… while Sansa is now Sansa Lannister, which makes a complication. Brienne insists that does not relieve him of his vow, but he asks what she wants him to do—kidnap his sister-in-law and then take her… where? Where, he asks, is safer than King’s Landing? Brienne tells Jaime to look her in the eye and tell her that her truly believes Sansa will be safe in King’s Landing. Jaime hesitates… and looks away. But then he looks back and asks if Brienne is not in fact a relation, as every Lannister he’s seen since his return has been a “miserable pain in my ass.” He notes she has the hair for it, if not the looks.
They depart, but after they go, it’s clear someone else was watching them. Sansa looks up, and sees nothing.
Walking alone up the hill from the sea, Sansa hears a rustling among the trees. She becomes anxious and starts to move quickly, until she’s suddenly startled by realizing someone is following her. He grabs her shoulder, frightening her, and the man stumbles back, telling her it’s all right. She notes he’s drunk. He admits he is, and he has good reason to be. He was once a knight, he says, but now he is just a fool. Then he asks if Sansa knows him… and she does recognize him as Ser Dontos Hollard, from the king’s nameday celebration. She apologizes for not recognizing him, but he says none are necessary; he may be a fool, but he’s a living fool thanks to her. She says anyone would have done the same to spare him Joffrey’s wrath, but he notes only she did. Dontos then notes he has nothing to repay her with… except one thing. He pulls a necklace from a pouch, telling her it’s worth more than his life and once belonged to his mother, and her mother before her. IT came from a time when the Hollards were a strong house, a house on the rise, and that the necklace is all that is left of those days thanks to some “fat, sad drunks like me”.
Sansa says she can’t take it, but he insists that she take it and wear it, giving his name one more moment in the sun before it fades. Sansa says she will wear it with pride.
On a forest road where bodies and looted wagons lie strewn, the Hound and Arya ride on, ignoring them. Arya asks when she’ll get a horse of her own, and Sandor mocks her, saying “little lady wants a pony.” She says she wants away from his stench. He then notes horses aren’t easy to come by… and even if he could, he wouldn’t put her on her own horse when she’s the only thing of value left to him in the world. She questions his having failed to steal anything from Joffrey when he left, but he replies he’s no thief when she suggests he’s not smart. She remarks that killing little boys is fine by him, but thieving is beneath him. “A man’s got to have a code,” he replies. She then asks if he thinks she’ll escape, and notes she has nowhere to go, and no family. Sandor replies she has her rich aunt Lysa in the Vale. “Once I sell you to her, maybe she’ll have enough left over to buy you that pony you want so much,” he tells her.
As they look at an occupied inn, Arya notes that she and he are both hungry. The Hound replies he counts five horses, which means five men, more than he feels like killing on an empty stomach. Two of the men walk out of the inn to relieve themselves. Arya tells Sandor that she recognizes one as Polliver, who captured her and her companions, taking them to Harrenhal. She adds he killed Lommy. The Hound asks, “What the fuck’s a Lommy?” She replies that he was her friend, and that Polliver stole her sword and pushed it through Lommy’s throat. Then she sees he still has her sword, Needle. The Hound mocks her having named her sword. “Lots of people name their swords,” she says. “Lots of cunts,” he retorts. He looks over to her… and sees she’s snuck off.
He chases after her as she approaches the inn, and stops her just before entering, but a Lannister soldier inside the inn opens the door and sees them. The Hound is forced to let her enter, and enters with her. As some of the men molest a serving girl, others pause to stare at their entry. Polliver tells the men to leave off. He watches them pass by and take a seat. As the men return to their assault, the innkeep begs Polliver to intervene, as the girl is a good girl. Polliver tells him to shut up and pour more ale, and then they may not take her with them “when we’re done with her.”
Then Polliver recognizes one of the two newcomers. Arya, thinking he recognizes her, reaches for the hilt of the Hound’s sword… but it’s the Hound that Polliver recognizes. He joins them at the table, and tells the innkeep to pour them some ale. He asks what the Hound is doing so far north. The Hound asks the same, and rejects Polliver’s suggestion that they’re keeping the king’s peace, as the war is over. Polliver agrees, and says he’s been stuck with the Hound’s brother while all the real fighting has happened. He quickly says he means no offense—the Hound indicates he’s taken none—and says the Mountain is great at what he does, but it’s nothing but torture, torture, and more torture of prisoners.
Polliver asks what life is without some fun… and then glancing at Arya, suggests that he doesn’t have to tell the Hound that. “I’ve had better,” Sandor replies to the crude implication. Then Polliver suggests they should join his company, that there’ll be plenty of opportunities to torture men and women into giving them gold, silver, daughters, and anything else the men want between where they are and King’s Landing. The Hound replies that he’s not going to the city. Polliver tries to argue they can do whatever they want, wherever they go, because they wear the king’s colors. “Fuck the king,” Sandor replies. The inn grows quiet.
Polliver reports that he had heard that the Hound had run at the Blackwater, but he hadn’t believed it until now. The Hound tells him to bring him a chicken. Polliver asks if the Hound plans to pay for it, and when the Hound replies that Polliver paid for it, the soldier chuckles and says no, they didn’t—but they’re the king’s men. Then he asks if the Hound has money. Sandor says he hasn’t got a penny, so Polliver offers a trade: one of their “ittle chickens” for his, looking at Arya. The Hound stares at him and then calls Polliver a talker, and that listening to talkers makes him thirsty. He reaches over the table, takes Polliver’s mug of ale, and empties it. He also notes he’s hungry, and now demands two chickens. Polliver looks back at his men, and then tells Clegane that he doesn’t understand the situation. “I understand if any more words come pouring out of your cunt mouth,” the Hound replies, “I’ll have to eat every chicken in this room.”
Polliver wonders how a man who lived his life for the king would be willing to die for some chickens. “Someone is,” Sandor finishes. Then Polliver springs up from his seat, drawing his sword, but teh Hound knocks him down. He forces down another man, slashes a third, and tangles with two more as the soldiers try to overwhelm him. They begin to force him back, and then down to the ground, kicking at him, but he fights his way free. He forces one man to stab his own compatriot in the groin and then, struggling with that man, repeatedly forces the man’s face down on to his own dagger. Clegane struggles up… only for one man to be struggling up as well.
Arya, having watched silently all the while, leaps forward and taking up a mug smashes it over the man’s head. Taking his sword, she casually shoves it into his chest. Then turning, she sees Polliver stumbling toward the Hound with a drawn knife. She slashes him across the legs, driving him to his knees, then throws aside the sword so that she can pull Needle from Polliver’s belt. The soldier falls onto his face as the Hound kills one of the last surviving soldiers. Polliver turns as Arya begins to repeat, word for word, the words Polliver said to Lommy before he killed him. And just like Polliver killed Lommy, she slowly shoves Needle through his throat, leaving him to choke on his own blood. Arya wipes the blade on her sleeve as Polliver dies.
The Hound is then seen riding out of the wood, eating a leg of chicken… and behind him rides Arya on her own horse, taken from the dead men. She smiles as they ride on into a burning wasteland where mountains climb in the distance.
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